Mothers Day

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Once a year we set aside a day to show our appreciation for someone who really deserves it. They brought us into this world, they raised us, they taught us and they supported us, even when we didn’t deserve it. Our moms. This weekend we get to spoil our moms the way they spoil us the whole rest of the year.

Where would you be without your mom?

You are a downright pain in the butt. And nobody knows it more than your mom. When you were younger you cried and threw tantrums, you screamed and yelled and got in trouble. And there was your mom putting up with all of your nonsense and mess and getting you through it. Who else in the world can say that (Dads are excluded here as they like to pawn the work off on the moms; you’ll get your credit on your own day)?

Then you hit puberty and became an absolute nightmare to live with for everyone around you. You didn’t want to listen anymore, you knew everything and everyone else was wrong all the time. Your mom put up with you.

You went to university/college and your parents nearly went bankrupt to pay for you, and you wanted to drink and party instead of studying. You were absolutely ungrateful because that money meant nothing to you at the time. Your mom put up with you.

You moved out and only called her on weekends if you remembered to because you had more important things to do. You had different worldviews and opinions on how to live your life and you fought about it. Your mom put up with you.

And how did she deal with all of this?

She was with you through every single part of your life, put up with all of your ups and downs. And you know what the crazy thing is? She still loves you. Nobody in their right mind would still love you after all of that. But she does. Your mom is so incredibly special because she will always be there for you no matter what. She will care about you, give you advice, and help you in any way she can anytime she can. She always will because no matter what you do, you’ll always be her baby in her heart.

So all of that stuff you put her through? This weekend is your time to do your best and pay her back for all of that devotion. You spoil that woman rotten and you make damn sure you remind her how important she is and how much you love her. She deserves all the thanks you can give and more because she has done so much for you.

Show her how much she is appreciated. Give her a great mothers day!

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Relationships: Make Them Stronger

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If you’re in a relationship, chances are you want things to work out. You finally met that guy or girl you’ve been looking for, maybe you’re married and want to stay married or you just want to build your relationship up. What I’m going to tell you is dead simple but it’s something lots of people seem to forget.

Spend time with them.

How many times have you had errands to do and you split them up between yourselves to make them go faster? Or come home and take some personal time? Sharing activities with the person you care about is essential in relationship building. Being in the same room or house as them does not count. Do things together. What strengthens relationships is the time spent together and the memories you make together. How can you do that if you don’t spend time with them?

Find a hobby.

If you’re struggling to make time during the day then the easiest thing for you to do is to both make a commitment to an activity that you’ll do together. Maybe you both like to go bowling, or golfing. Find something you both enjoy and set time aside to do it. Lessons are a great way to do this. Set you and your significant other up for dance lessons or a sports team. It’s something you have a schedule for, and you are less inclined to miss it because you paid for it ahead of time. It’s easy, it’s fun and it’s something you’ll both enjoy. You’ll probably even make some new friends doing it!

Find some alone time.

If you have kids, or you’re always spending time with friends, you can lose that one on one time that is so important in maintaining that bond. Take a walk, have a little dinner date or go see a show together. Something to get away from everything else and have that alone time together. Making it special or romantic too gets you bonus points.

If you have problems, Talk It Out.

If you get mad at them or are irritated by something they do, don’t hold it back and stew about it. If you do, you’re just going to explode later on about something little and your partner will be confused. Don’t hold it in, talk it out. If you talk it out, even if the other person doesn’t like what you have to say, they will understand that it bothers you. Personally, I don’t like to know that I’m bothering people. So I might get angry that I’m getting in trouble for something, but I’ll generally try and fix the behavior enough so that it’s not a bother any more. But more generally, if you care about someone then you don’t want to be on their bad side. So talk it out, they’ll understand. Don’t walk away from it either. If you walk away you’re just postponing the problem. And when you walk away from a problem you tend to stay away because it’s a negative experience and it is really hard to go back and address it a second time because now it’s a source of frustration. Talk it out instead of getting worked up, instead of fighting. Fighting solves no problems.

So if you want to strengthen your relationship, find the time to strengthen it. Spend time with that person and make an effort. Talk out your problems instead of stewing about it. Make new memories and genuinely enjoy being with that person. You chose them after all. So take your relationship and make it better. Strengthen it. And love them.

Love: Finding “The One”

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This is the dream many people have. Young girls imagine their prince charming who will sweep them off their feet. Boys imagine the girl of their dreams. As we get older we date other people looking for the one. We date all different kinds or personalities and looks to see if we can find the one that matches with us just perfectly. So why is it so hard for so many people? It’s not as complicated as you’d think.

Stop looking in the wrong places.

You will not find the one in a club or a bar. You just won’t. The mindset is all wrong. Nobody goes to a bar or club to find love they go for intimacy and attention. Or just to get drunk, whichever you prefer. You are more likely to meet someone who’s a friend of a friend or someone in one of the social groups you’re a part of. Why? There’s no expectations. It’s more comfortable and less awkward because there’s already a common connection there.

Be happy with who you are.

If you don’t like you, how do you expect someone else to like you? The first thing you have to do before you even think about looking for the one is to become the person that you’re going to be happy living as. Maybe you don’t like your weight, your self esteem, your hair color or your smile. 90% of people have things they don’t like about themselves. You don’t necessarily have to change these things, you just have to find a way to be comfortable with them.

Be yourself.

Form your lifestyle. Do the things you like to do, talk to the people you want to talk to. Don’t be fake to try and make friends or meet someone, or lie or exaggerate to make yourself look better. If you can’t be honest about yourself, it doesn’t really matter who you meet or who you date. You know why? They’re not seeing the real you. Ever. So those relationships will never work out. Even if you manage to make it work for awhile, once you settle in the real you will inevitably come out, and the other people are going to know that that’s not the person they thought you were.

Do what you want to do.

Do you really think you’re going to find someone with similar interests doing something you don’t like to do? Maybe, but probably not. You’re more comfortable doing what you like anyway. It makes it easier for your true personality to shine through and you will definitely come off as a much happier, more lively person. If someone is going to fall for you, don’t you want it to be for something you just do naturally?

Stop looking.

Don’t waste your time. You have an idea of the kind of person you want to be with so you’re naturally biased to choose that kind of girl or guy. But what the heck do you know about who’s right for you? Have you found them yet? Anybody who’s married will tell you the person they married is absolutely not their usual type they would go for. But they’re the person that was right for them. We think we know what’s best for us but we really don’t. So stop looking. Have you ever heard somebody say, the minute you stop looking is the minute you find someone? It’s true. When you stop looking you stop caring. You start living your life and that’s exactly what people fall in love with. If you’re always out looking or trying too hard, it comes across in your personality and your mannerisms. It’s just not an attractive quality and other people see it.

I can’t stress this enough. Be yourself. Stop looking for that someone. Build your life the way you want it to be and once you have it you will find someone who wants that life too. You won’t have to try, and you won’t have to look, it will just come naturally.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Relationship: Show That You Care

relationship-quotes-for-relationship-quotes-collections-2015-4One of the most important things in life are our relationships. People that are important to us like our loved ones, friends and pets. They’re things that are always there, and sometimes, often in fact, we take them for granted. I too am guilty of this.

So I got to thinking yesterday. What if all of a sudden, someone important in my life just wasn’t in it anymore? Think about that for a second. Pick someone in your life that’s important to you. Got someone? Now imagine that person or animal just vanished tomorrow. Would you be happy with the way you’ve been acting towards them lately? Or would you regret the way your relationship left off when they disappeared? If you’re like me, you’re probably in that second category.

The sad truth is we take people for granted.

We don’t show them the love or care that we really feel for them. Why? It’s because they’re always there. We can always do that tomorrow.

That’s the wrong way to look at it.

All those people we’re close with, they’re important to us. So show them! Call your mom and dad, because what if you couldn’t? Kiss your lover because what if you couldn’t? Take your kids out for ice cream because what if you couldn’t!

We get so caught up in our everyday lives that we don’t always make the time for the people we care about. When you think about it that’s just so heart wrenchingly unacceptable. Treat those people like the important people they are in your life. You’re never too busy. If you tell yourself you just don’t have time, you are lying to yourself.

 Make. Time. Because what if you couldn’t?

So how do you make time? You have to want to. You’re leaving for work in the morning, you say goodbye to your significant other. Stop! Instead of walking out that door, walk over and give them a kiss before you go. It takes a few seconds, but trust me when I say it makes a difference.

You just moved away from home, you’re living on your own for the first time. Going to parties, living it up, drinking, having a good time. Call your family once in awhile. It might take a few minutes out of one day. You might not care because you’re having the time of your life, but they do.

It’s the little things that make the biggest difference.

Showing someone you care doesn’t take time. It takes effort. You have to put in that effort. You have to want to. So take that extra few seconds every day, do that little something extra. You’ll thank me for it.